Month: June 2018

Achievement (Morning Reading)

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Woman must not accept; she must challenge. She must not
be awed by that which has been built up around her; she must
reverence that woman in her which struggles for expression.
~Margaret Sanger

Our desire to grow, to make a place for ourselves in the world of our friends, to know
that we have counted in the lives of others, is healthy and necessary to our existence as
whole women. The inner urging to move ahead, to try a new approach to an old problem,
to go after a new job, to learn a new skill, is evidence of God’s eternal Spirit within.

Our meaning in this life is found through following the guidance that beckons us toward
these new horizons, perhaps new friends, even new locations. We can trust the urge.
we can reverence the urge. It will not lead us astray, provided we do not try to lead it.
We each have a special gift to express in this life among those to whom we’ve been led.

For years, many of us quelled the inner urge out of fear; but, fortunately, it didn’t desert .
us. To be human is to have a constant desire to be more than we are. The fears still come,
but as we move through them, with the support of other women, other friends, the program
gives us the thrill of achievement. We know there is meaning in our existence.

The need to grow, to change,
to affect the world around us is
part of God’s plan for each of us.
I will trust the urge;
I will let it guide my steps.
~ From Each Day a New Beginning

 

 

 

Patience (Morning Reading)

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Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.
~Lida Clarkson

We all want life to unfold according to our plan. After all, we are certain we know
what’s best for us. But hindsight quickly reminds us that few, if any, of us had included
recovery in a Twelve Step program as part of our life’s plan. Yet here we are, and we
are now more content than we’ve ever been in our lives. How did this happen?

We have come to accept that God has worked in our lives in spite of ourselves. We
have been protected and guided all along the way, even though on occasion we stubbornly
attempted to force open doors that were not beneficial to our growth. Fortunately, God never
gave up on us. We will fulfill our purpose with all the help we need when the time is right.

Remembering that opportunities come to us
when their time is right allows us to wait and trust.

My patience will pay off today. I can be certain
that what comes to me today is on time.
~From A Woman’s Spirit

 

 

 

 

 

Check out my new list –
Why I Dislike Summer!
I need a lot of patience right now!!

Trading Places

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The last two posts explained about how accepting that other people have different perspectives can help defuse conflict and lessen the angst we feel.  The idea of being able to say, “in my opinion that person should act/say/think this certain way, AND they don’t have to.”  We are recognizing our thoughts and expectations as valid, and we are giving others space to live by their own thoughts and expectations.

Now we move to trading places by taking it a step further.  Once we can accept that others think differently than we do, we can try to understand it by trying to look at life through their eyes.  We can put ourselves in their shoes.  So many times, we don’t have the full story.  For everyone there are factors from the past that have brought them to where they are now.  There’s no way we could ever have the whole story because even if we live with them the entire time and experience everything with them, we don’t have their personality, their gifts, their disposition.  We may be tempted to say, well, if I can’t possibly have the whole story, what would be the point of trying to trade places?  We will be able to have empathy and accept the other person easier if we try to trade places with them to see life from their point of view.

I’ll admit it’s not an
easy thing to do,
especially when intense
emotion is involved.
I have been able to
use the skill though
with some successes.

 

 

On a different note… this morning while coming home from dropping off the kids at camp, I heard an article about the REAL reason people commit suicide.  The radio host was paraphrasing from an article written by an expert who’d done decades of research and counseled a lot of people.  When the speaker said “we think that depression causes suicide, but here he says that while it can contribute to it, it’s not a cause.”  This intrigued me so I kept listening.

The expert says that the one thing all people who’ve thought about or attempted suicide have in common is despair.  This word when taken apart is des-pair – the un pairing from ourselves.  He explained a lot of ways this is manifest.

  • Hopeless – being unpaired from thinking it can get better.
  • Helpless – being unpaired from having resources to make it better.
  • Powerless – a deeper form of helpless.
  • Useless – being unpaired from knowing there is something I can contribute.
  • Worthless – being unpaired from knowing we have value.

I’m sure there were more.  These are the type of words someone in despair would go over and over in their mind, describing themselves and their situation.  The speaker said it’s our job then as Christians to help those in despair to become paired with themselves through reconciliation with God and His plan for them based on how he made them.  He is the answer to hopelessness, helplessness, worthlessness.  He is the answer to all the questions.

As I ponder this and consider how I can help a specific friend, it strikes a cord with me.  I’m praying for wisdom to be able to reach out and share this is a way that resonates.