Many people haven’t learned how to self-soothe or they think it’s wrong to concentrate on themselves or they don’t deserve it.  When in a stressful situation they turn to others for comfort.  It’s a wonderful thing to have friends and family to turn to, AND it’s a valuable skill to be able to soothe yourself when you are alone.  Again, this is intended for a high stress, possibly crisis, situation.

Self-soothe is an imperative skill.  I always wanted our children to be able to “play by themselves.”  In other words, be able to find things to do such that I didn’t need to be their playmate all day.  It’s a healthy thing to be comfortable being alone and not feeling paralyzed by it.  I think I missed the mark, though, on teaching them to self-soothe.  They do well spending time on their own without causing trouble, getting bored, etc.; they don’t do so well calming themselves down when they’re in a frustrating situation.  Planning to keep working on this with them – especially now that I have more tools to use.

Self-soothe is basically using your senses to be mindful, or tune into your body, sensations, feelings, emotions, and calm the body and mind.  We practiced this a few times using the 5-4-3-2-1 method.

New quote posted.