The third part of ABC after Accumulate Positive Experiences and Build Mastery is Cope Ahead.  This skill is for planning ahead when you know something might not go well, and you want to be prepared or if you are worrying about something in the future to the point of not being able to be mindful of the present.

Cope Ahead is one of the few DBT skills that doesn’t have an acronym provided by Marsha Linehan – so I came up with my own!

C – Check the facts.  Describe the situation that is likely to prompt problem behavior; be specific. Name both the emotions and actions likely to get in the way of using your other skills and the problem-solving skills you want to use.  Write it out if that’s helpful.

O – Observe the future.  In your mind, imagine the situation as vividly as possible.  Watch it play out as if it was happening around you and to you right NOW.

P – Practice.  Practice using those skills you identified as the scene plays out.  Go over your actions, thoughts, words, etc. Think through using your problem-solving skills to cope effectively with the worst-case scenario.  Stay focused.

E – Exit the future.  When you’ve played the scene all the way through, exit the future and become mindful of the present.  Spend some time relaxing and soothing yourself in the surroundings you’re in NOW and leave the future be until that time arrives.

The first part of the Emotion Regulation Module was the review of how emotions work, and the second part was about changing our response to emotions.  This was the Opposite Action skill.  After that PLEASE was part of how to reduce our vulnerability to Emotion Mind such that we can stay in Wise Mind.  The next set of skills is part of that reducing vulnerability section…

• A – Accumulate Positive Experiences
• B – Build Mastery
• C – Cope Ahead

Accumulating Positive Experiences helps build positivity into our life for the long term.  As we do more things that give us joy, we have less time to dwell on the negative.  Here are the steps listed in the DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition 2015 by Marsha Linehan…

1. Avoid avoiding – start now to do what is necessary to build the life you want. Use these steps if you don’t know what to do.
2. Identify values that are important to you (check out the Narrowing Down Values post and list)
3. Identify one value to work on for now.
4. Identify a few goals related to this value – the how of building that value in.
5. Choose one goal to work on now.
6. Identify small action steps toward your goal.
7. Take one action step now.

These steps are baby steps and are meant for those who are having a hard time processing, seeing the positives in life, and remembering that distress will eventually pass.  For someone who doesn’t need to break down the process into baby steps, there is a list of Pleasant Events that has a wide and varied list of activities.  Our list was three pages, but some of it was redundant so I’ve narrowed it down to one page and posted it under Lists.

Build Mastery is similar to Accumulating Pleasant Events in that it’s choosing to do positive things now such that the long term is “a life worth living.”  The difference is that Build Mastery is about choosing to do things that are hard but possible and gradually increasing the difficulty of what you’re doing over time.  The bottom line is to do things that speak to your heart and mind that you are capable, that you do have gifts and talents, and that the shame of worthlessness can be overcome.

Part of the overview included why it’s hard to regulate emotions.  One of those, Lack of Skill, is why DBT was created and others including Biology, Attitude, and Overload, all have specific skills in the Emotion Regulation Module that speak to overcoming them.

PLEASE is the skill that addresses roadblocks of biology; it’s the acronym to help remember ways to take care of ourselves physically.

• P &
• L – Treat Physical Illness. Take care of your body by seeing a doctor when necessary and taking prescribed medication
• E – balance Eating. Don’t eat too much or too little. Eat regularly and mindfully throughout the day, and stay away from trigger foods, those that make you feel overly emotional.
• A – avoid mood-Altering substances. Stay away from illicit drugs and drink alcohol in moderation, if at all.
• S – balance Sleep. Try to get 7 to 9 hours of sleep a night, or at least the amount of sleep that helps you feel good. Keep to a consistent sleep schedule, especially if you are having difficulty sleeping.
• E – Exercise. Do some sort of exercise every day. Try to build up to 20 min of daily exercise.

(From DBT Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition 2015 by Marsha M Linehan)

When the kids were little I took them to Early Childhood and Family Education classes (ECFE).  Part of the classes were together and part of the class time the parents and kids separated with a child development instructor and a parent instructor.  Our instructor explained the acronym HALTS to us – kids are more likely to have tantrums when they are…

• Hungry
• Angry
• Lonely
• Tired
• Sick, Sad, or Stressed

We all agreed that this goes for us as adults too!

One last thought to consider today…