The second skill in the Distress Tolerance Module is Pros and Cons.  This may seem pretty basic, but it’s not when someone is in a desperate crisis situation or in a situation that feels that way.  It was explained in the context of controlling the urge to do something drastic, something addicts and those struggling with anxiety, depression, eating disorders, etc. deal with a lot.  We were encouraged to write it out ahead of time and carry it with us, so when the urge hit, we could pull it out and remind ourselves.

Acting on Crisis Urges. Resisting Crisis Urges.

Here are a couple visuals to help explain it.

This shows a basic chart for general pros and cons of acting on a crisis urge.

The second is a chart to help look at short- and long-term goals in light of tolerating a distressing situation or acting out. (Remember – “One must survive the short-term without making it worse in order to improve the long-term.”) After thinking through these options, it’s easier to say, I’ll do this now so that it doesn’t get worse.  (easy to say; hard to do!)

This last chart shows the pros and cons of changing an emotion.  We are in control of our emotions. Just a reminder – emotion lasts 60-90 seconds; if it continues, it’s because we feed it. Sometimes writing it out can help the mind settle and see the best course.  Sometimes it shows us – at least me – how my emotion may be too long, too intense, or misguided.

Keep in mind, this doesn’t mean the emotion is BAD!  Emotions are just information shared about how our brain and body are reacting to a trigger.  If someone steps on your toe, you may be annoyed.  If someone hits your car, you may be angry.  If someone accidentally throws something of yours away, you may be sad.  These are normal emotions; everyone feels this way at some time.

Back to pros and cons – I’d love to know if this was helpful.  Did you use it to make a decision?  Have you used it before in a distressing situation?

Check out the new List about moving forward…